This Feeling Deep Inside Me
by xBrokenHallelujah
Summary: Syaoran seems to have weird feelings towards his socalled best friend Sakura whenever they're together. Is Sakura Kinomoto really his best friend? Or is it far more than friends to him?
1. Childhood Memories

Title: Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Main Characters: Sakura Kinomoto (15 ½) and Syaoran Li (16)

A Cardcaptor Sakura Fanfic

**Chapiterrr Oneess: Syaoran's Flashback**

**(Part 1………)**

Summary: As the days passes by, Sakura and Syaoran stays as close friends, until they've reached to the teenage life…they've never talked since the very first day of their 13th lives…But will Syaoran hold back this pain and agony of not talking to his so-called friend? Or is it more than friends to him?

A/N:-Okay… this is my first fanfic so please bear with me if it's quite messed up 'kay, -

(Based on Syaoran's POV…)

I woke up, sat down in my bed and rubbed my eyes. I feel so drowsy… -sigh-

I took a warm bath and changed my clothes and went to the dining room where Wei was cleaning…stuff.

It's been 3 years. 3 long years of agony. How am I supposed to keep living like this? I can't think straight. She's clouding my thoughts.

Those green emerald eyes I used to stare at all the time, Gone. I need her…

(_Flashback)_

"_Syaoran! Happy Birthday!" an emerald- green- eyed girl said." Thanks Sakura." I said while accepting the gift Sakura gave me. She was my bestfriend since the start of elementary and we never spend a day without talking to each other. It was my 10__th__ birthday today and she said to meet her at the penguin park. So I did what she said and now I surprisingly received a hug from Sakura. She never hugged me surprisingly…Only now. Next month was her birthday and I know EXACTLY what to give her…A teddy bear and a whole box of chocolates.._

_A month later…_

_-Ring ring-_

"_H-h-hello?"_

"_Hi Sakura. Happy Birthday." I said._

"_Uhh..T-t-thanks Syaoran." She replied._

"_Is something bothering you?" I asked while beginning to worry._

"_Nothing's bothering me Syaoran…" She said silently…_

"_Where are you now?"_

"_I'm at my room…" She replied frightingly._

"_What happened? Why do you seem scared?"_

"……………"

"_Sakura, please answer me. Tomorrow's your birthday and you're sad. I can't stand seeing you sad." I said to her in a comforting voice._

"_Well…It's because my dad left and my brother went to Yukito's house and told me that he's gonna spend the night there... So I'm here all alone in my room and in my house…Syaoran…I-I'm S-s-s-scared." She finally said._

"_What?!?! Sakura, I'll pick you up right away and I'll tell Wei to call your dad and tell him that you're staying in my house. Why didn't you tell me this?" I said._

"_B-b-but- -" _

"_No but's"_

_5 minutes later…_

_-Ding dong-_

"_Who's t-t-there?" Sakura said._

"_Sakura it's me."_

_Sakura immediately opened the door_

"_Let's go." I said while gently grabbing her hand and went inside our car (limo actually… , )_

_At Syaoran's place_

"_Did daddie agree to let me stay in your house?" She asked. "Yeah. He said that he'll pick you up as soon as his work's done." I replied rather sadly. To tell you the truth, I didn't want to let Sakura go home. I wanted her to stay with me._

"_So what do you want to do now?" I asked while opening my door and leading Sakura in. It was quite late so she was getting kinda sleepy but I seem to notice that she's trying _

_to keep herself awake. She was wearing a pair of pajamas with brown teddy bears surrounding it. She loves them so much. Me, I was wearing a pair of PJs myself…She looked cute twirling her hair and smiling all of a sudden…she's a natural cutie. Woah, what am I thinking?? She's just a friend Syaoran. Just a friend. But she has those cut little angelic faces, that perfect smile, a true person, absolutely perfect inside-out. WHAT AM I THINKING!! Ughhhh…… -smacks forehead-_

"_Umm…Syaoran?" Sakura curiously asked me. I wasn't paying much attention that I was talking to myself AND I slapped myself for no good reason… Well, I __**do**__ have a reason, but she doesn't know of course…_

"_Syaoran?" Sakura asked again, now getting worried._

"_Huh? What? Oh, sorry Sakura…I wasn't paying attention to you…" I finally said after I fought myself…Weird._

"_What did you say awhile ago?" I asked embarrassingly._

"_I said…umm…what did I say?" she answered in a rather Sorry-I'm-stupid tone._

_Chuckle._

"_You want to go to the garden?" I asked._

"_If it's okay with you, Syaoran." She replied._

"_Let's go then." I said while holding her hand. I felt a warm feeling inside of me whenever I touch her…Oh no…What am I feeling? _

Since they're still 10, they don't actually understand why/what they're feeling whenever that "feeling" occurs)

_They arrived at the Li garden where lots of fire trees and cherry blossom trees surround a sort of mini lake._

"_Wow! –jumps up and down- what a beautiful garden you have!" Sakura said excitedly._

_Chuckle. How cute she is. What the—AGGGHHHH…… Syaoran get a grip! Stop it. Stop it._

_-Goes to the bubbly-but-sleepy Sakura-_

_As I went near Sakura standing in front of a tree, I quickly hid from the nearest tree…Sakura…was…singing._

_Kiss me sweet,_

_I'm sleeping in silence._

_All alone,_

_In ice and snow._

_In my dream, I'm calling your name,_

_You are my love…_

_In your eyes, I search for my memory._

_Lost in vain, so far in the scenery._

_Hold me tight, and swear again and again,_

_We'll never be apart._

_If you touch my feathers softly,_

_I'll give you my love._

_We set sail in the darkness of the night, out to the sea._

_To find me there, to find you there,_

_Love me now, if you dare._

_Kiss me sweet,_

_I'm sleeping in sorrow._

_All alone,_

_To see you tomorrow._

_In my dream, I'm calling your name,_

_You are my love…_

_My love…_

From Tsubasa Chronicles)

**A/N: Soo…. How'dya like it? I would appreciate any suggestions for the following chappies! I would also like reviews too, **

**If you don't like it…D 3 You hurt my feelings!!!! XD joking!**


	2. Strange Feelings

**Actions Speak Louder Than Words**

**Chapiterrr Two: Syaoran's Flashback**

**(Part 2...)**

_As soon as she finished that wonderful song, I saw tears trickling down her face following by silent sobs. I didn't know why she was crying but a part of my __**now-beating-so-darn-fast-I-could-scream-any-minute-for-no-good-reasoned**__ heart knew why. And I can't seem to understand (_**Yet.**_) I saw her wipe her tears away and sat down leaning her back in the cherry blossom tree. Yes, she may not me neither crying nor sobbing but she had a face that tells me that she's ubberly depressed. I acted that I didn't see anything and went slowly near her. She quickly changed her face into a happy one (too bad that wouldn't work on me now, would it?)_

"_Are you okay?" I said with my voice as soothingly gentle as I can._

"_Yes. Why? I'm smiling aren't I?" Sakura said letting her fake smile happen again._

_Chuckle. _

"_Your action speaks louder than your words, Kinomoto-chan." I said._

"_Huh? What do you mean?" she asked._

"_Oh, Nothing." I said, leaving her making a cute pout. She was always cute when she pouts and everyone in our class proved it._

"_It's getting dark, Syaoran. I'm scared." She said while scooting over next to me._

_Well, as you know, Sakura was afraid of ghosts and yes, the dark._

"_Come. Let's go back inside." I said when suddenly she was clinging to my arm. I felt a tinge of pink in my cheeks and I don't have any single idea why it did that. Aren't I supposed to know this feeling? Come on, Syao. You're 11 already. I gave myself another stupid argue of how stupid I can be and grumbled, leaving a rather shocked Sakura-well- shocked. I told her that it wasn't her that I was grumbling about but something else. _

_Although she tried to ask me what it is, I didn't budge… Leaving Sakura pouting __**again.**__ –Sigh- she really is an angel… Now that's really a true statement many people tell her and after they say that to her, Sakura would turn her porcelain skin to a tomato-colored one._

_Chuckle. As we went inside she wanted to go to my room and try to look at all the things in there __**(talk about **__**privacy**__**, Sakura)**__Luckily I had a chance to hide away private stuff from my desk…except- -_

"_Oh would you look at that. A picture of me and Syao-kun dancing in our Christmas Party last year. Hahahaha you look so cute Li-kun: 3" She happily exclaimed leaving me grabbing it from her while she was doing that irresistible pout again. She lied down on my bed looking at the ceiling, feeling all sleepy. Ah-hah, I thought to myself, now's the time to wake her up._

_I quietly snuck up to her and tickled her gently but playfully, leaving Sakura laughing and crying out my name to stop. I did stop after a while when she nearly had lost her breath for awhile…_

"_Nasty ol' trick, Syaoran. You got me." Sakura said while still attempting to catch her breath._

"_Ha-ha. You're slower than me and I'm stronger than you, Kinomoto." I said._

"_Hmph. That's because I'm a girl Syaoran." Sakura said while she stuck her tongue out. Sakura lied down again and accidentally dozed off. I noticed this and pulled the blanket to cover her. I also fixed her messy hair. After all, it's my fault it was messy. She looked so peaceful and more angelic when she's sleeping. I touched her oh-so-soft cheeks and left my room quietly and went back to the dining room._

_I saw Wei cleaning some more stuff again. What's with this guy? Does he have a day without cleaning with us not telling to? Tsk tsk._

"_Young Master Syaoran, where's Miss Sakura?" asked Wei._

"_She fell asleep in the room so I left her…" I answered._

_I went back to the room and sat on the chair next to the bed and read a book. Every once in a while I would glance at her…no, Stare at her angelic face. After a while, she woke up yawning cutely (yes, cutely). I smiled at her while she smiled back._

"_I guess I dozed off ne, Syaoran?" she asked._

"_Hai." I simply replied. I was too preoccupied in reminiscing her face…her beautif- - Drat. Here I go again. Stop it Syaoran. Even though I __**can't **__stop it, I don't know what I'm feeling which is awkward._

"_Nani?" Sakura said while looking at me with curiosity in her eyes._

_Crap. I totally forgot to take my eyes off of her. I embarrassingly apologized for staring at her- - __**like that. **__- - She just laughed afterwards._

_It's getting late and Wei told us that Sakura's father will arrive shortly._

_I frowned._

_I don't want her to leave._

_Not yet._

_When I heard Wei calling us I sighed and said bye to her. She hugged me, I hugged her back with yet another shade of __**darker**__ pink in my now-burning cheeks._


	3. Syaoran

**Chapiterrr Three!**

**A/N: I.aM.M3 thank you for the review! C:**

_Sigh. She left. I desperately went back to my room slamming my oh-so-big door. I was getting sleepy. Very sleepy. I looked at the time and saw it was 12:00 A.M. No wonder Sakura was sleepy…_

_I realized that I was sleepy myself so I decided to sleep as well…_

_I wonder what she's doing now… Agh. She's probably sleeping you idiot. Stupid stupid stupid. Why am I like this?? _

_It's all her fault._

_It's her fault that I'm feeling this way._

_(5:30 A.M.)_

_-Karrriiiiiiiiinnngggg Karriiiiiiinnngggg-_

_Ugh. Stupid alarm clock. I'm still sleepy. I wonder why I set it up in the first place. There's nothing specia- - - _

_OH DRAT. _

_I quickly woke up leaving me hitting my head in a corner. I quickly changed my clothes and ran off leaving Wei trying to catch up with me. I went to her favorite chocolate store and got a box full of teddybear chocolates. Then, I went to a stuff toy shop and bought a brown teddy bear with a yellow ribbon around it. After all of that, I didn't realize that I was running the whole time. Tired, I sat down to the nearest bench. The bench right in front of the penguin park._

_Crap._

_Suddenly, I saw __**her.**__ She was wearing a red dress with matching shoes with her hair partnered with red ribbons. She was licking her ice cream with Tomoyo, who was taking pictures of her…Tomoyo glanced at me and so did Sakura…The moment Sakura looked at me, I felt strange. The tingly feeling in my heart was… Weird. I decided to go to them but luckily I hid the presents under my coat._

"_Nice to see you, Syaoran-kun!" Tomoyo said while picturing me being hugged by Sakura._

"_Hiya, Syao-kun!" Sakura exclaimed. She was so bubbly today. Of course she's bubbly, stupid! She's always like that! And besides, it's her birthday today. She has all the reasons to be freakin' bubbly. Stupid of me._

"_Nice to see you guys." I plainly said. Sakura asked me if something was bothering me but I plainly gave her one of my warm smiles to reassure her._

_So we went to her favorite Cherry Blossom tree. Tomoyo left because she clumsily left her gift._

_So that's it._

_We're alone._

_Together._

_Standing in a Sakura tree._

_A shade of fuchsia was colored in my cheeks. Good thing she didn't see it though. She was staring at me like I was an abomination or something from another planet. To stop letting her stare at me like that, I nervously got the chocolate box and gave it to her._

_She said thank you to me and put it on top of her lap. I told her to open her hands – and so she did- then I got the brown teddy bear from my warm coat and gave it to her, leaving _

_her jumping on me while hugging me. Thus, we stumbled and she fell on top of me still hugging me._

"_Oof!" I said._

"_Ow…" was her reply._

"_Are you okay?" I said in a gentle tone._

"_I'm fine Syao-kun. Oops! I must be heavy!" she quickly got off of me with her still clenching the teddy bear I gave. Honestly, She wasn't heavy at all._

_She gave me a peck on the cheek as a thank you. I took it seriously and yet again…the shade of pink is on my cheeks again! Suddenly we heard a click behind us…_

_To make the matters worse, it was Tomoyo who recorded everything that happened…_

"_TOMOYO DAIDOUJI!!!" we both shouted with tomato-colored faces leaving Tomoyo screaming her head off while she took the tape from her videocam and hid it somewhere…_

**A/N: I hope you guys like it! C:**


	4. Sakura

**A/N: Guys! I'm really sorry for letting you wait for sooo long! It's just that school days are really stressing and I don't have that much time to write!**

**Thank you to:**

midnightblue123,Kinomoto232,I.Am.M3 and many others!

I.Am.M3 thatnks for the suggestion,too! XD

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**Chapter 4**

**( Still…) Syaoran's Flashback**

"_Very funny, Tomoyo-chan.__** Very**__ funny." I said rather plainly but still, my face was still much reddened. Sakura, beside me, still much slightly red; maybe even redder than mine. Tomoyo was smirking at us. Golly, I wanna shut her mouth and tape it so I couldn't see that huge smirk of 'ers. _

"_Tomoyo-chan! You're a big meanie! To think that I was your cousin..." Sakura said then stuck out her tongue._

"_Hohohohohohoho! You and Li-san are so Kawaii!!" the black-haired girl replied._

_I mutter angrily (copyrighted: Minette :o Marquez). She's so mean. Nah, not the mean--mean but---mean. That's all I can describe about her now. Now where did she hide that tape? Grrr.. Tomoyo.._

"_Oh don't you worry Syaoran. The tape is all secured in a place where nobody will know!" Tomoyo said accompanied with that huge, annoying little smirk of hers again. Woah. How did she know that I was thinking about that???? Weird girl._

"_H-how d-did y-y-you know tha- - " I stuttered and stop when Tomoyo changed her smirk into a wide-faced grin (freaky, indeed). "Oh, I have my ways, Syaoran-kun." She replied. "Oh, would you look at the time; I probably should go now Sakura. I have a lot of things to do in my room." She said. Sakura and I replied with a nod and off she went skipping to go to her limo._

"_So, uh, what now?" I said to cut off the silence between us._

"_I don't know." She replied._

" _Thanks again, Syaoran." She said while covering her face with her auburn-colored bangs._

"_For what? Oh that. No biggie." I replied while looking at her cuddling the bear I gave._

"_Syaoran?" _

"_Hmm?"_

" _I... I ... nevermind." _

"_O-okay."_

"_IHAVETOGONOWBYE!" she quickly said and ran towards the pedestrian lane and quickly disappeared with the big flock of yellow-uniformed students._

"_Woah." I said while I was trying to recall what she said. It was too fast for me to understand and pay attention to her. Sighing, I went back to our place. I was feeling all sleepy with all that running (and not to mention Wei's comment on me dashing out of the house so early in the morning and running to buy different kinds of stuff). I plopped down on my bed and started sleeping... _

_ "Syaoran, why did y-you d-do t-this to me?" _

_ A pale white face which was covered by bangs was imaged... This person seemed like a female. Tears running down her pale face... It was raining hard. She sobbed and left running farther and farther until it was a total darkness. Sobs heard all over this ebony place -- _

"_AHH!" I woke up sweating and my heart pounding so fast._

' I can't believe I still remember that dream... For all these years... Yes, I will never forget that dream' Syaoran thought.

"_That dream was nasty. Ugh... I'll go back to sleep."_

_Sobbing_

"_AGGHHHH. Stop it with the same dreams!! AGGGHHH!" I covered my head with the white, fluffy pillow beside me and slept __**again**_

_The dream repeated on and on and on. I couldn't take it anymore._

"_Stupid dream." I said while scratching my head irritatingly and got off of the bed._

"_Ugh. What now? This house is so boring. What am I going to do now?..." I said while going down and going to the lounge. I sighed. "Maybe you should go play with your friends , Young Syaoran." Wei said while vacuuming the oh-so-big carpet. "Why should I play with them at this time, Wei? I went out with them just a few hours ago..." I replied while Wei shrugged and continued doing his.. Vacuuming._

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**A/N: This is all for now peeps! Just leave a comment if you want me to continue. Thanks a heap!! XD**_  
_


	5. Signs

**A/N: Hey guys! Im baack! I'm really very sorry for the REALLY long time update. I really am , you know. -shifty eyes-**

**Tch. School life nowadays don't give you just a minute to spare for me to write.**

**I'm also recieving comments that this story is a little "flashbacky." Hmm, please, just lemme finish the story because I really want you guys to understand the WHOLE thing.**

**C'mon. Gimme a break. Sorry for the "grammar" issues, ne? I just don't have the grammar and spelling check with me and hey, no one's perfect, right? Right? -wiggles eyebrows- **

**So here, the last of the "flashbacky" stuff (You happy now, anonymous-commenter-who-hurt-me-tenfold? -sniffle tear-).**

**Thanks to ElliCole, whose been an inspiration to me.**

**Guys, In my story, you guys can suggest what'll happen next.**

**Note: This is my first time writing a story here so please bear with meeeeeeee. D: **

**There's this person who's been reading my story and supporting it and I thank you, midnightblue, for everything.**

**Okay, look. I'm really not good in showing my gratitude but for your information, I'm really very grateful.**

** Enjoy! **

**- Wait. Before you enjoy, I shall type one more thing...-**

**DISCLAIMER: I beg to dream and differ that I don't own CCS and their characters. -cries.- **

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**Chapter 5**

_Wei and his non-stop-cleaning-the-darn-house-even-though-it-is-darn-clean-already was starting to bug me. I opened my mouth and closed it again, thinking it over that it wasn't necessary to ask such questions. I absent-mindedly went to the place I was only not bored to go, the garden. Even though I wouldn't do anything there, I still decided to go and just sat down under the shade of one Sakura tree. _

_That tree made me remind of her. Why am I becoming so obsessed to her for no darn reasons? I shrugged and got up. I went down to the basement and went inside a room with punching bags and all sorts of gym items. I decided to do everything that would quench my boredom. After all that, I began lecturing myself for not doing this every time I was bored. I was wiping the sweat on my forehead while I went up the stairs._

**3 Years Later...**

I rode on my bike and headed for school. Wow, 13 years old now. I opened the big silver gate to the school and walked towards the classrooms. When I was on my way there, someone patted me on the back rather playfully. I, not knowing who the hell the person is, went to defensive mode. In front of me was a pair of dark blue orbs with a Cheshire grin. "Eriol." I plainly said while he plastered a straight face towards me. "'SUP BRO?" he playfully said while that straight face was replaced by his Cheshire grin...again. "Hmn." I responded while I went back walking towards our classroom.

1st year High School Section A-1.

"Something the matter?" Eriol said while he was taming his navy locks. 'Yes, something is bothering me, but I can't explain it to you.' I thought to myself. "OI. Li Syaoran. OI!!" I saw Eriol snapping his milk-white hand in front of my face. "Uh...Er... Don't mind me, dude... I'm okay."

As we went to our respective classroom, Eriol and I got ready to face the session of the girl-classmates-we-don't-actually-know-their-names-but-still-swoon-at-us people and not to mention the envious stares at the guys. Some of our friends stare at us like that and was very irritating. "WHAT!!??" Eriol and I said in unison to all of the people swooning and envy-staring at us. The girls –who were practically inches away from us- fainted because of our irritated looks. One girl managed to be conscious after that. "It's because you two are so...H-h-hot!!" the girl squealed, "I mean, your hair all messy and your hot faces irritated...its just so--"the pony tailed girl fainted again. We both sighed and went to our seats –with the swooning girls still swooning and following us-.

"Great." I spat to Eriol, " First weak of school and it's still the same thing. Oh joy." I said sarcastically. Eriol chuckled and said, "Dude, this is how your life is. Deal with it. You were born with an... irresitably attractive face _and _body," he let out a stifled chuckle while I glare daggers at him and he continued, " You have to expect this. You might even get the right girl for you." He said.

You might even get the right girl for you...

_You might even get the right girl for you..._

**You might even get the right girl for you...**

_**You.Might.Even.Get.The.Right.Girl.For.You**_

Those words just can't get out of my mind. I swear I'll have to kill Eriol for this.

_**Sakura... Kinomoto.**_

It's been a very long time since we saw each other again. Why did I have to go to Hong Kong anyway?! Argh. If I hadn't stayed there for three years just to hear Meling's rants every single day and to traing even though I didn't need to...

I would've stayed with her...

I would've shared moment with her...

I would've been by her side...

I would've solved this non-stop feeling for how any years now towards her...

Would I?

And now here I am, Back in Tomoeda, Japan. I saw all of my friends who were small and cheeky now confidently walking with those smirks that can melt any girl in front of them. Nothing changed much. Three years have passed and everything was still in the exact same place.

Even the park.

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Soo... How was it?

PLEASE COMMENT!

I really need the support here. Infact, I don't really think you guys like it.

That means I just wasted my time?!

Please comment so that I know that I'm loved by you people, so that I know I'm not typing endless words for nothing, and so that I could continue the story.

I'll give you guys Holographic Fries! I love fries!! XD

-smiles sweetly to you- I'm open to any suggestions, okay?


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